An excess of salt has built up in the traffic arteries

There is controversy within the local governing body that oversees the distribution of orange barrels and the shoveling of asphalt for roadway patching. The Engineering and Roadway Department employees are mad at their boss, because budget cuts did not allow them to have raises, but the state saw fit to give the boss a raise. And so all the cunning foxes are crying "Sour grapes! Sour grapes! My God, why have you forsaken me?!"

There is no money in the budget to give these people raises because it's all been spent on new metal signs that say ROAD CLOSED, as well as DETOUR and GONE FISHIN'. Perhaps there would be more money in the budget if they would stop spending it on road salt. Engineering and Roadway Department employees have been spreading salt on the same streets over and over again, regardless of whether we get any snowfall. Just this week, I saw four different trucks spread road salt four times in a 24-hour period (before a snowfall predicted to be only a dusting!) I know, because I watch everything that happens outside.

And I know it's wasteful: here on my street, we've got salt spread on top of salt on top of more salt, and it's a level grade cul-de-sac! We've got so much salt, the deer herds are coming to lick the gutters, and I think I saw Daniel Boone curing some ham hocks.

So to all the county employees who did not get a raise, I say: divide up the excess road salt among yourselves and take home a few barrels. That should be worth something.